There are two articles in the Times today...

...that could have come straight out of the Onion. One is about elementary school recess coaches and the other is about keeping bees in New York City.

At Broadway Elementary School here, there is no more sitting around after lunch. No more goofing off with friends. No more doing nothing.

Instead there is Brandi Parker, a $14-an-hour recess coach with a whistle around her neck, corralling children behind bright orange cones to play organized games. There she was the other day, breaking up a renegade game of hopscotch and overruling stragglers’ lame excuses.

They were bored. They had tired feet. They were no good at running.

“I don’t like to play,” protested Esmeilyn Almendarez, 11.

“Why do I have to go through this every day with you?” replied Ms. Parker, waving her back in line. “There’s no choice.”

Broadway Elementary brought in Ms. Parker in January out of exasperation with students who, left to their own devices, used to run into one another, squabble over balls and jump-ropes or monopolize the blacktop while exiling their classmates to the sidelines.
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In the article about beekeeping, there's a picture of

Andrew Coté, president of the New York City Beekeepers Association, which was formed two years ago and has 220 members.

He looks fairly sane.

New York City is among the few jurisdictions in the country that deem beekeeping illegal, lumping the honeybee together with hyenas, tarantulas, cobras, dingoes and other animals considered too dangerous or venomous for city life. But the honeybee’s bad rap — and the days of urban beekeepers being outlaws — may soon be over.

Dingoes are illegal?

Another beekeeper is a Mr. Sam Elchert:

Mr. Elchert admits that so far he has found his hobby more “nerve-racking” than relaxing...

“What if somebody, some cop, sees me?” he said. “It’d cost me $2,000. It’d really ruin my day.”
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Beekeepers say that beekeeping is a relatively low-maintenance and inexpensive endeavor — Mr. Elchert said he spent $500 on hives, equipment and about 20,000 bees to start.

20,000? That sounds like a lot of bees! My family freaks out when there's even one remotely near our house. But compared to Katrinka and Chico Moore (Chico?), Mr. Elchert is a piker:

Mrs. Boyer said that she and her husband, Chico, took up beekeeping last year so that they could teach workshops in Haiti, where Mr. Boyer was born.

The earthquake has delayed the couple’s plans, but their hives are thriving with 80,000 bees that have yielded more than 100 pounds of honey.

“We gave it to friends for Christmas,” Mrs. Boyer said. “They love it. Everybody is asking for more.”

Ms. Moore said that after working in advocacy against gas drilling in upstate New York, she looked to beekeeping for some relief.

She said: “You get honey. You’re also pollinating gardens. It’s such a positive, happy thing to do.”

My grocery store sells at least a dozen brands of honey, and they all taste the same to me. How much of a honey connoisseur would you have to be to keep 80,000 bees at your home?