I just put my corned beef...

...on the stove, and boy does it look good. (Somebody call the cops!)

My son, who is home from college on Spring Break, asked me when it would be ready.

"About four-thirty," I replied. He gave me a quizzical look.

"Why? What did you have in mind?"

"Oh, I don't know -- dinner time?"

"That is dinner time." (These crazy college kids with their crazy ideas!)

But as I was opening the package, I noticed the cooking instructions (my emphasis):

Remove from bag.

So far, so good.

Place corned beef and spices in a large pot. Add water to cover. Cover pot and place on medium-high heat. Bring to a boil. Once the water comes to a boil, skim foam off top, reduce heat to medium-low, cover and simmer for 2 1/2 - 3 hours or until desired tenderness. Corned beef is tender when easily pierced with a fork. Slice against the grain and serve with boiled potatoes and cabbage, if desired.

First of all, I don't really need these directions because I can always call the Corned Beef and Cabbage Hotline my 92-year-old mother.

But it's that last line that got my attention: "...serve with boiled potatoes and cabbage, if desired." (My emphasis.)

Is that really necessary? Couldn't they just as easily say, "...serve with chocolate syrup, if desired?"