My corned beef and cabbage...

...turned out great, by the way.

But I thought the cooking instructions on the bag were a little curious:

Remove from bag. Place corned beef and spices in a large pot. Add water to cover. Cover pot and place on medium-high heat. Bring to a boil. Once the water comes to a boil, skim foam off top, reduce heat to medium-low, cover and simmer for 2 1/2 - 3 hours or until desired tenderness. Corned beef is tender when easily pierced with a fork. Slice against the grain and serve with boiled potatoes and cabbage, if desired.

Slice against the grain and serve with boiled potatoes and cabbage, if desired.

Couldn't they have written just about anything before the words, "if desired?" Serve it outside on the patio, if desired. Eat it with chopsticks instead of a knife and fork, if desired. Serve it with chocolate pudding, if desired.

Oh, well. Next on the menu: homemade corned beef hash!