I received a postcard today...

...that said:

You are cordially invited to attend a FREE DINNER WORKSHOP. This event is by invitation only. You must be over 18 to attend. To make your reservations for you and your guests, call (800) 293-9829 and give the RSVP code below!

* Are you unable to LOSE weight despite all the DIETING and EXERCISE?

* Think you have a HORMONAL problem but your doctor says "all your tests are normal?"

* Are you unable to do the things you NEED and WANT to do because of LETHARGY and CHRONIC SLEEPINESS?

* Do you get chronic INFLAMMATION in the MUSCLES and JOINTS which don't seem to go away?

* Are you tired of trying to overcome HOT FLASHES, NIGHT SWEATS, and PMS?

* Are you looking for an ALTERNATIVE to taking MEDICATIONS?

Seating is limited. Call (800) 293-9829 and give the RSVP code to secure your reservations. We look forward to seeing you and your guests and contributing to the quality of your life!

It was signed, and I'm not kidding, The Cheesecake Factory.

(I have a better idea. Want to lose weight? Start by staying the heck away from the Cheesecake Factory.)