There's a campus cop...

...at Dartmouth College by the name of Brad Sargent. And do you know what his rank is? Yep; Sergeant.

Now, as bad as Sergeant Sargent sounds, I'll bet it was even worse when he was Private Sargent (or when he becomes Lieutenant Sargent some day).

"Private Sargent is on the phone."

"Who?"

Or,

"There's a Lieutenant Sargent here to see you."

"A what?"

Why do people like that always choose careers that make it so confusing for the rest of us?