Steve Forbes and Paul Ryan...

...were on CNBC the other day, and the two men are rapidly ascending my list of Least Favorite People in the World. I would have absolutely no trouble believing -- that under truth serum -- their prescription for the less well-off in our society would be to "Let them eat cake."

Really, could a more odious pair possibly exist in the universe?

Steve Forbes, who -- as far as I can tell -- has never had to apply, or even interview, for a job in his life (much less hold one), has to be what FDR had in mind when he coined the term "economic royalist." The scion of the famous publishing family wore a neck brace on the show after having recently undergone back surgery. He joked -- twice -- that he wanted to have the procedure done "before Obamacare kicked in." Ha ha, what a cut-up! (Joe Kernen was particularly tickled by that jab; Ryan was only present for the second go-around but smirked as well.)

Now Forbes was born with a huge silver spoon in his mouth, has lived his entire life with that spoon firmly ensconced in said mouth, and no doubt will die that way. His personal net worth has been estimated well into the hundreds of millions. Not only has Forbes been a member-in-good-standing of the Super Rich for his whole life, but I seriously wonder if he's ever met anyone who hasn't. And you know what I say? God bless him! I wish it were me. His father and grandfather worked hard and invested wisely so that he would never have to.

But there was something just a little unseemly about Forbes, who my late father would have referred to derisively as "a rich man's son" (or grandson, as in his case), giggling about having his back surgery "before Obamacare kicked in." Seriously, has there ever been any doubt that the super rich in this country -- before or after "Obamacare kicks in" -- would always have access to the best medical care in the world? (As well they should.) But there's something just a little disappointing about a privileged guy like Forbes begrudging a poor person basic health care.

Before Obamacare (which Forbes has correctly pointed out hasn't even begun yet), it had been estimated that 47 million Americans were without health insurance and, in effect, without access to medical care. Not only is the United States the richest, most prosperous (and, okay Republicans, greatest) country in history, but also the only developed nation in the world not to offer universal coverage for its citizens. And according to a study by Harvard Medical School last fall, tens of thousands of Americans die each year due to lack of health insurance. And yet here's Steve Forbes, who probably arrived at the CNBC studios from his New Jersey estate in a limousine, talking disparagingly about "Obamacare." My heart bleeds for you, Steve.

Then, just as my blood was approaching its boiling point (and this is all before eight o'clock in the morning, mind you), Paul Ryan, Republican Congressman from Wisconsin (Janesville, no less -- my mother-in-law's hometown!) joined the show and congratulated Joe and Becky Quick for replacing Carl Quintanilla with someone who actually has a spine (Steve Forbes). Ha ha!

This guy is really scary.

Paul Ryan is supposed to be the "thinking man's Republican." Heaven help us. He's the guy who not only makes all of his new staff members read Atlas Shrugged, but is also the author of "A Roadmap for America's Future." (Isn't Ryan, at age 40, just a tad old to be still going through his Ayn Rand phase?) I'll confess that I haven't read "The Roadmap" in its entirety, but as far as I can tell, it involves achieving a balanced budget at some point in the future by eliminating Social Security, Medicare and Medicaid, while -- at the same time --preserving the current level of defense spending and cutting taxes on the rich. Nifty, huh?

Now Ryan would never admit that his plan envisions eliminating Medicare, for example. He merely thinks that the federal government should distribute vouchers in its place. My 90-year-old mother (forgive me, Ma, for telling the world your age), for instance, would be given a voucher worth about $2,000 in today's dollars to buy health insurance in lieu of Medicare. Never mind that $2,000 wouldn't buy much of a policy for anyone, anywhere; who in the heck would write one for a 90-year-old woman? No one. No, as far as I can tell, Ryan's plan is to do away with entitlements altogether and let everyone -- excepting the wealthiest among us -- rot.

It's as if you showed the federal budget to a fourth-grader and said, "Balance this." (The federal government, as Paul Krugman has pointed out, is basically an insurance company with an army --that's what we're paying for.) Any fourth-grader could look at the budget and say, "Cut entitlements and you can bring the budget into balance." Thank you, fourth-grader! But the challenge we face is in bringing some sanity to our budget process while simultaneously preserving the safety net for the neediest. (Just like they've been doing in Europe for decades.) Or, as FDR once put it:

The test of our progress is not whether we add more to the abundance of those who have much; it is whether we provide enough for those who have too little.

So please, CNBC, find some other guests for your show. I've had enough of people like Steve Forbes and Paul Ryan. Let the former go back to playing polo in the horsey environs of New Jersey while the latter can teach a seminar in Objectivism somewhere.